Fatherhood catchup and review

I am officially a father. Devin was born on April 14, 2007--just 3 days before my own birthday.

I'm sitting, writing this in the apartment-office of a colleague during my lunch break so that I can take the entire break uninterrupted. This is necessary for two reasons. First, with a newborn baby in the home, my wife and I cannot make our own schedules or do much that is not specifically for the baby--I can't use the toilet, eat a meal or brush my teeth when I want to! Second, at my job there is no real break room and if I try to take lunch at my desk, more times than not, I am interrupted by work that must be done right away. I don't mind it most of the time--I enjoy most of the work I do and the people I do it with and for--but, much like it is at home now, it is nearly impossible to get anything done per my own agenda while within 20 feet of my office. This said, I will probably compose this post in a few sittings and possibly even across a few different days in addition to posting multiple posts on the newest, most exciting topic in my life!

There is an interesting counterpoint here where the little time I have for myself while at home taking care of my two favorite humans on the planet plays against the time I am forced to take to take care of other peoples' software needs in order that I am able to provide, financially and materially, for myself and those two favorite humans on the planet.

So, here I am. Back at work after a full two weeks of paternity leave--the first two weeks of my son's life. It was very difficult, emotionally to leave my wife and child for the first time on Monday. A few fathers I know told me that it would actually be a welcome break for me to go back to work. I assumed that meant that most of these men were bad fathers and husbands--I didn't want to leave them and I don't think it's fair to expect my wife to go through all of this by herself while I am away. The more she and I spoke about having a baby, the more the topic came up of her limited choices after conception. She often pointed out that I, as a male, could escape this incubation, labor and delivery at any moment whereas, once she had decided to keep the child she could never escape any of it and could easily be left alone to deal with it. She and I both knew that this would never be the case--we do everything together and as full partners to the point of the absurd in some cases--but the possibility was still an emotional challenge for her and it helped her to talk about it. Back to the counterpoint topic--while I don't want to be at work right now, I am able to take a lunch break and I am able to do what I want with it. And what am I doing with it? Publishing a journal entry about the new slightly frustrating but infinitely rewarding home situation in order to share my experience with the tiny world of humans interested in knowing about it.

That's it for now. Pictures and more rants to come. . .